On the Run

13 Apr

It’s been an exciting evening in my neck of the woods. I was having a pleasant visit with my parents when one of their farm hands came to the door and announced that there was a fugitive on the loose. However, I don’t believe he was looking for the one-armed man.

The farm hand lives in a barn on a separate piece of land (Don’t worry, it’s a really nice barn.) and got a call that he needed to lock it up because a man and a woman were running from the police. They had abandoned the roads; taken to the woods; and led the cops on a merry chase through briars and thickets and all sorts of sharp objects. According to the farm hand, the officers were cut up with ripped uniforms. They succeeded in catching the woman, but the man was still on the lam.

However, the farm hand did not arrive at the house of my parents with a warning. He had locked the barn; bush-hogged the field; and then realized that he had locked himself out. He needed my dad to drive to the barn and unlock it. Due to the shakiness of the situation, I stayed with my mom in case the David Janssen wannabe showed up.

This is when my friend, who constantly listens to the scanner, called. What? Doesn’t everyone have a friend that constantly listens to a scanner. He is also an official weather watcher for the National Weather Service. Anyway, he calls to find out what’s happening in our part of town, and I report what I know. Then, he fills in that the pair had robbed a beauty supply store, which is exactly the place I would rob. He confirmed that the police chased them through the briars and thickets and all sorts of sharp objects but added that the cops were not too happy about it.

As this is being posted, the woman is in custody, and the man is still on the run. The police are confident that he will be caught soon because he is being slowed by bags full of shampoo, conditioner, two curling irons and a flat-iron.

4 Responses to “On the Run”

  1. sj April 13, 2012 at 03:55 #

    They’re like Pumpkin and Hunny Bunny! No one EVER thinks of robbing the Beauty Supply Store!

    • surroundedbyimbeciles April 13, 2012 at 04:46 #

      It was obviously a well developed plan.

  2. paintlater April 13, 2012 at 04:57 #

    You had me a bit worried with the “bush-hogged” I’ve never heard of this but it doesn’t sound sweet. It sounds like what might happen to that prissy felon when he gets caught. Cheers Sue

    • surroundedbyimbeciles April 13, 2012 at 12:46 #

      Ha. I assumed everyone knew the term, and that’s what I get for assuming. Bush-hogging is cutting the grass in a large field. A tracter pulls a large mower, and we call the mower a bush-hog.

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