Master Control

Back in the 80s, there was a television show called The Equalizer, which starred Edward Woodward as Robert McCall.

He was a former intelligence officer with exquisite tastes and a cool, black Jaguar. Of course, you can’t have a show about a retiree riding around in his car, so McCall placed an ad in the newspaper saying:

Got a Problem?

Odds Against You?

Call the Equalizer.

He got calls from ordinary people caught up in extraordinary situations and calls from people from his intelligence officer past. McCall got all of them out of jams with the help of some old intelligence officer buddies. One of those old friends was my favorite character on the show. He was even more cool than McCall.

Control was the head of McCall’s former agency and always seemed put out by McCall’s need for assistance. It could be that he was put out by his own bow tie.

I was fascinated by Control because his name fit his persona. This guy only lost his cool when McCall was bugging him. Let a defector show up, and he had it under control. Let bullets fly by, and he was under control. Control was the epitome of control.

I started thinking about this character the other day when I almost lost control for the first time that I can think of. I wouldn’t call myself a control freak with the definition that I need to orchestrate everyone’s lives. However, I have always been a little obsessed with self-control. I was always the kid who followed the rules and didn’t get into trouble. When I hear friends talk about being punished by their parents, I don’t understand because I can’t remember doing anything to get punished.

Heck, the craziest thing I did was major in History. That really upset them.

I guess that’s good, but, as I get older, I regret not losing control a little more. People tell stories about driving the back roads and drinking beer, but I didn’t do that. Others talk about the spectacle that is Spring Break. I went to Europe with my parents. Of course, there are other illicit and illegal activities that people look back on. Guess what, I didn’t partake in that, either.

I don’t know. Maybe I didn’t miss anything by never losing control, but sometimes I think I did. I do know that Control in The Equalizer didn’t seem to be a very fun person. I hope that with my self-control I have been fun than him. At least, I haven’t worn any bow ties.

Tags: Control, Edward Woodward, Television, The Equalizer