I went to Oregon to watch a football game, but I am not going to write about it. Sitting through it was enough, and I have no plans to relive it. Instead, I am going to write about the day before the game, back when Tennessee fans still had their innocence.
Friday started out simple enough. We ate at IHOP, and that is always a good way to the day to begin. After that, we drove to the stadium to see what was going on. Turns out, there was a lot going on. The Oregon cheerleaders and dance team were practicing. People were shopping for souvenirs in the bookstore. The Oregon football players were warming up.
As we walk around, a man toting a box came up to welcome us to town, and he introduced himself as the Director of Football Operations. That’s a pretty big job in an athletic department. However, that wasn’t all. In addition, he serves as the director of Peyton Manning’s quarterback camp. Mentioning Peyton’s name is always a good way to endear yourself to Tennessee fans.
Next, we drove over to the basketball arena. You see, Elliot went on the trip, and he is a huge Oregon fan. He really wanted to see the inside of the basketball arena. We went from door to door, and everything was locked. However, I learned a long time ago that there always an unlocked door. We found it, and he got a great picture of the interior of the arena.
After this episode of trespassing, we took a short drive to the coast and the town of Florence. We didn’t really see the ocean, but we had a nice drive over. Florence is a river town and has a history of a fishing-based economy.
Today. Florence has a tourist-based economy with shopping and restaurants. We ate at Mo’s, which sits on the river and has a nice overlook. It was pretty cool to watch seals playing in the water.
However, that wasn’t as cool as who we met while in Florence. Larry started talking to a man who introduced himself as Don Essig. That didn’t mean anything to a Tennessee fan, so he explained that he was the public address announcer at the Oregon football games. Apparently, he invented the phrase, “It never rains in Autzen Stadium!” The next day, we learned that the entire crowd says it with him. Anyway, Larry replied that he is the public address announcer for the Lebanon Blue Devils, our high school team. Don was impressed an informed Larry that there is a national organization of announcers.
We figured that we had topped out in Florence and headed back to town. We drove around for a while and made our way to the downtown area. Elliot and I walked around. I know that doesn’t sound exciting, but when you hear a homeless man yelling up ahead things get exciting. It got even more exciting when he told a woman to do something anatomical with a goat. Oh, I also saw a sign for an upcoming concert by Five Finger Death Punch.
Yeah, that was probably enough for downtown, so we went back to the stadium. Remember when I said that there is always an unlocked door. Well, a door opened up for us. A worker was going into the stadium, and Elliot asked if he could go in. Larry and I quickly followed, and we all found ourselves standing in the middle of the field. I was in the end zone more than the Tennessee football team.
That’s about it for our day. Well, there was one other thing. We went to dinner at a local brewery, and our waitress was a professional bodybuilder. She looked like she could have kicked everybody’s asses. It’s a good thing she didn’t because we were going to have enough of that the next day.
He looks so familiar.
Which one?
The one one the left of the screen