Archive | Childhood Memories RSS feed for this section

Tangled Up in the Schneid

23 Feb

When people think of men playing slow pitch softball, a few images might pop into their heads. A bunch of non-athletic guys hobbling around and drinking beer. A church league where there are a lot of swings and misses. An intramural league in college where the athletics team up to dominate everyone else.

That may be what people think about, but I grew up in a different kind of game. My dad sponsored a professional men’s slow pitch softball team, and we played at the highest levels of the sport. We flew throughout the country to play in the biggest tournaments and had players at the peak of their athletic form. When I try to describe how good these guys were, people can’t believe that most of the players could hit softballs out of baseball stadiums.

(Time for a little bragging. In recent years, my dad, his manager and four of his players have been inducted into the Tennessee Softball Hall of Fame.)

We played in a lot of big games, but a game was truly important when Ray Molphy, the Voice of Softball, was announcing the game.Ray Molphy

I can vividly remember playing under the lights on a Saturday night with thousands of people around the field. Ray’s voice would be booming through the air as he announced the game. While he didn’t take sides, Ray told me privately that he was also pulling for us. Our budget wasn’t as large as the teams we were playing, so we were a perpetual underdog that made sure our opponent was in for a fight.

Like all good announcers, Ray had catchphrases that everyone recognized.

If a player had hit for a single and a home run, then he had hit for “the minimum and the maximum”.

When a team was coming up to bat in an inning, the first batter was in the box; the second batter was on deck; and, the third batter was “lurking in the shadows”.

If a player had not yet gotten a hit, then he was “tangled up in the schneid”.

I have been thinking about Ray’s lines because I feel that I am tangled up in the blogging schneid. I am having a hard time coming up with anything that is interesting or original. My posts are lacking something that I can’t put my finger on. It just feels that there is something missing.

When a player stepped to the plate and heard Ray talking about the schneid, they would react a couple of ways. One, they would get mad and make it worse. Two, they would use it for motivation to get a hit. I don’t know which way I am going to react, but, right now, I feel like the schneid is all over me.

Childhood Memories – Country Roads

6 Jan

When I was a kid, there was a restaurant on the outskirts of town called El Rancho. Everyone went for the barbecue, but I wanted to go for a couple of other things. I loved their french fries and was fascinated by the little jukeboxes on the tables. Flipping the silver tags to scan the pages of the songs, I pleaded with my parents to let me drop in a nickel.Jukebox

They always relented, and I always played “Take Me Home, Country Roads” by John Denver.

I am not sure if I sang, but I knew all of the words.

Almost heaven, West Virginia
Blue Ridge Mountains
Shenandoah River –
Life is old there
Older than the trees
Younger than the mountains
Growin’ like a breeze

Country Roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West Virginia, mountain momma
Take me home, country roads

All my memories gathered ’round her
Miner’s lady, stranger to blue water
Dark and dusty, painted on the sky
Misty taste of moonshine
Teardrops in my eye

Country Roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West Virginia, mountain momma
Take me home, country roads

I hear her voice
In the mornin’ hour she calls me
The radio reminds me of my home far away
And drivin’ down the road I get a feelin’
That I should have been home yesterday, yesterday

Country Roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West Virginia, mountain momma
Take me home, country roads

Country Roads, take me home
To the place I belong
West Virginia, mountain momma
Take me home, country roads
Take me home, now country roads
Take me home, now country roads

There were a bunch of things about the song that I liked. The guitar part was cool. The words made me visualize going down a country road, and country roads were a big part of my life. My dad’s family lived in the country, and we had to go down small, winding roads to get to them.

When we were not going to see my dad’s family, we were taking my mom’s parents on Sunday drives through the country. The highlight was always stopping at an old store to get a Coke and a snack. I remember people sitting on their front porches and my dad waving at all of them as we went by.

John Denver’s song hit home for me. It wasn’t until later that I realized that the song was wrong. While there are plenty of country roads in West Virginia, the Blue Ridge Mountains and the Shenandoah River don’t go into it all that much. It seems that a guy that took his name from a city would know something about geography.

Childhood Memories – Dallas

27 Nov

The death of Larry Hagman brought to mind another television related childhood memory. My family, like many others, was totally addicted to Dallas and the ongoing saga of the Ewing clan.

The family that preys together stays together.

The family consisted of characters that defined a city, a network and a decade. Of course, Hagman was the star as J.R. Ewing, oldest and most devious son. He went after oil and women with the same furor.

However, Jock, the patriarch played by Jim Davis, truly led the family. I always thought that the show lost something when Davis passed away. I also felt bad because Davis had spent a career as a character actor before finally gaining a starring role.

When Jock died, Miss Ellie took over as leader of the family. Barbara Bel Geddes, a veteran actress, played her as a motherly figure with a streak of toughness. She was the real owner of Southfork Ranch.

Patrick Duffy played Bobby, the other son who worked in the oil business. He was not a ruthless or as smart as J.R., but he was a Ewing and could do what needed to be done.

Pamela, played by Victoria Principal, was Bobby’s wife. The first episode showed why this was such a big deal. Bobby eloped and came home with the daughter of Digger Barnes, Jock’s archenemy, and the sister of Cliff Barnes, J.R.’s archenemy.

Speaking of wives, Sue Ellen, played by Linda Gray, was the former beauty queen and long-suffering spouse of J.R. He chased women, and she responded by getting drunk. However, Sue Ellen fought back by having a few affairs of her own.

Lucy, played by Charlene Tilton, was another Ewing at Southfork. She was the daughter of Gary Ewing, the son who couldn’t stand the oil business and escaped to Knots Landing. As a growing boy, she was my favorite character.

Steve Kanaly played Ray Krebbs, Jock’s favorite ranch hand. He started out as an evil character but transformed into a good guy. The series began with him in the hayloft with Lucy, but later it is discovered that he was her uncle.

I remember all of those characters well, but a few other things stand out in my childhood memory. One was the opening credits with the classic Dallas theme. It interspersed scenes from the city of Dallas with the characters, and I couldn’t wait until they showed the field of my favorite team, the Dallas Cowboys. When my dad took me to a game in Texas Stadium, part of me thought I would see J.R. at the game.

I also remember “Who Shot J.R.?”, the original cliffhanger. Everybody spent the summer wondering who shot him. What stands out to me? I figured it out. It was Kristin Shepard, Sue Ellen’s sister. Want some real trivia? Kristin was played by Mary Crosby, the daughter of Bing Crosby.

So, there is my ode to Dallas. Rest in Peace, Larry Hagman. You brought us some great memories. If J.R. could have bought Jeannie from Tony Nelson, then there’s no telling what he could have accomplished.

Childhood Memories – TBS

16 Nov

When this blog was in its infancy, there were a couple of posts called Childhood Memories. One was about my parents taking me to an Elvis concert. Another was about the cross-country trips that my family took every summer. Yet, another was about our weekend excursions to Gatlinburg. It’s been a while since Childhood Memories made an appearance, and I felt it was time to bring it back out.

I remember how great it was when we first got cable television. No longer was I limited to three real channels and a fuzzy PBS. There was much more television to explore. Australian Rules Football on ESPN. Cheap looking news sets on CNN. Slime pouring from the sky on Nickelodeon. It was a potpourri over never before seen material.

However, a lot of cable channels were filled with before seen shows. Reruns of shows that had faded into off air oblivion only to be revised as time fillers. Some, like My Little Margie, went back to my mom’s formative years, but most were the shows that my older brother grew up with. Gilligan’s Island. The Munsters. The Andy Griffith Show (my all-time favorite). The list goes on and on.

Everyday brought adventures that had been replayed countless times, but my favorite cable watching time was Sunday mornings. Before getting ready to go to church, I would hop in a chair; cover up in a blanket; and turn it to TBS. First, I watched The Three Stooges beat the crap out of each other. People talk about violence on television these days, but I don’t think anything is like seeing a guy get hit over the head with a crowbar.

Going against the grain, I liked the Shemp version of the Stooges a lot better than the Curly version. Curly worked at being funny, but Shemp brought it naturally.

The best of the Stooges.

Moe was just meaner than Hell, and I am not sure what role Larry was trying to play. Whatever the case, I watched The Three Stooges religiously on Sunday mornings.

However, that was just the opening act for the true reason to watch TBS. When the Stooges got out of their jams, it was time to watch the Robinson family never get out of theirs. I was fascinated by Lost in Space. Will and Robot. Don and Judy. John and Maureen. Penny. Dr. Zachary Smith. Heck, the Jupiter 2 was a character all its own.

They are not Swiss, but they are the Robinson’s.

It was an awesome show, but here is the thing. Just as I liked Shemp better than Curly. I liked the black and white Lost in Space better than the color one. The black and white version had a seriousness to it. The first episode was a realistic glimpse into the space program. There was suspense as Dr. Smith and Robot were out to destroy to mission. When the family found themselves lost on unknown planets, danger faced them at every turn. A trip in the Chariot meant avoided whirlpools, earthquakes and giant aliens. I can’t describe how cool it was.

Then, the show changed. It went to color and the aliens became pastel colored vegetables and interplanetary carnival barkers. Dr. Smith became a comedic character who constantly fought with Robot. Each episode was filled with lines like:

“You bubble-headed booby!”

“Oh, the pain, the pain.”

In short, it went the way to The Three Stooges. I read that the show changed because it had to compete with Adam West’s campy version of Batman. It wasn’t a good decision, but hindsight is 20/20.

When Lost in Space was over, it was time to get ready for church. As I sat in the pew drawing on offering envelopes, I though about Stooges poking the eyes out of each other and Robot saying, “Danger, Will Robinson!” The whole time I was wishing that I was back home watching TBS. I remember many episodes from those shows, but I don’t remember much about what I heard in church.

Dream the Chasing

20 Oct

I read a post by Butterfly’s Joy about a bad dream that she had, and it made me think about a recurring dream from my childhood. I haven’t had the dream in years, but I still remember it vividly.

It’s dark, and I am sitting at the edge of the woods that are just starting to creep up a rise in the land. As I look down into an open field, I realize that I am stuck. Is my foot caught under a log? Have I injured myself and am not able to move? I’m not sure. All I understand is that I can’t go anywhere.

I can’t see myself, but I can hear feel my heartbeat. I can see the steam of my breath in the cold, damp air. I can feel the chill of the air on my skin. I can hear the sounds of the woods. The details of the dream make it seem like reality. That’s when I hear the sounds from the distance.

The sounds are faint, but I know what they are. Men are shouting, and hounds are barking. The lights of lanterns and torches break through the darkness in the distance. I can’t see the men or the hounds, but I know what they look like. The men are wearing blue jeans and flannel shirts. They are wearing hats. Some are hunting hats, some are western style and others are worn out fedoras. It’s as if I have gone back in time to the 1930s.

They ain’t gettin’ ready to hunt no coons.

I hear the men in the distance and know that they are straining to hold back their dogs. I also know that they are after me, and I can’t move. That’s when the dream comes to an end.

However, it was a recurring dream, and each time it progressed a little further. It got to the point where I could see the men’s faces, and they knew that I was close. One night, they reached the edge of the woods and got close enough that I thought I could reach out a touch them. That was the last time I had the dream.

I don’t know what dreams mean. Once, I had a therapist who translated dreams in our sessions, but I didn’t take much out of that. Maybe dreams really have meaning. Maybe they are movies that we make up from images that we see in our waking lives. Maybe they mean nothing at all.

I know that this dream came to me often as a kid, and I have never forgotten it. I guess that makes it mean something.

Interweb Alphabet

10 Oct

When I was a kid, it was a family tradition to take a road trip every summer. We would get in the car with a semblance of a plan and drive across the country. It was a great way to travel and allowed me to eventually visit each of the 50 states. Of course, we had to fly to Hawaii.

Sometimes, the drives would get boring for a kid, so we would play games along the way. My favorite was the Alphabet Game. My mom would come up with a category, and we would take turns naming things in that category in alphabetical order. If the category was Cities, then it would go from Albuquerque to Baltimore to Chicago. We would do that until we made it to Z. I didn’t realize that it was probably educational.

Tonight, I have been at a loss as to what to write about. In fact, I’m not really in the mood to write anything, but that feeling is going to be pushed aside. Anyway, I came up with another version of the Alphabet Game. I am going to Google each letter and see what pops up first.

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ

A – the Twitter account for Andrei Zmievski

B – the Wikipedia entry for the letter B

C – the Yahoo summary of the stock activities of Citigroup, Inc

D – the homepage of D Programming Language

E – the online version of the E! Network

F – shockingly, it’s FaceBook

G – the Wikipedia entry for G-Force

H – the official website of the 4-H Club

I – a site called “I Am Bored”

J – the website for California’s J Vineyards & Winery

K – news of the music made at K Records

L – beautiful faces on the L’Oreal website

M – the M Resort of Las Vegas

N – a puzzle game that involves ninja and homicidal robots

O – the site for O: The Oprah Magazine

P – the Wikipedia entry for the letter P

Q – Q the Music entertainment depot

R – the R Project for Statistical Computing

S – the Yahoo summary of the stock activities of Sprint Nextel Corp

T – the website for T-Mobile

U – the history of the U-Boat

V – the website for V Magazine

W – the site for W Magazine

X – the music of X-35

Y – the rabbit hole that is YouTube

Z – the Wikipedia entry for the letter Z

I hope you didn’t find this post as boring as I did. I promise that I will never do numbers.

Cartoons Do It Better

14 Jul

Tonight, I saw The Amazing Spider-Man, the top ranked movie at the moment. It was a good movie and was very entertaining. However, this is the second installment of Spider-Man in recent years, and both face a problem. It doesn’t matter who stars – Tobey Macguire or Andrew Garfield. It doesn’t matter if it’s in 3-D or on IMAX. It doesn’t matter how many cameos Stan Lee has. No Spider-Man can compete with this one.

I grew up watching reruns of the 1960s cartoon version of the superhero. The background was frozen, and the characters barely moved. But, I couldn’t wait to see what villain would show up next. The Green Goblin was my favorite.

He had an awesome flying cycle and threw flaming jack-o-lanterns. At least, they looked like jack-o-lanterns to me.

However, the coolest part was the theme song that stuck into the minds of kids everywhere. So cool, it was covered by The Ramones. You know the beat, and you know the words.

Spider-Man, Spider-Man

Does whatever a spider can:

Spins a web, any size,

Catches thieves just like flies–

Look out: Here comes the Spider-Man.

Is he strong?

Listen bud,

He’s got radioactive blood.

Can he swing from a thread?

Take a look overhead;

Hey there– There goes the Spider-Man.

In the chill of night

At the scene of a crime

Like a streak of light

He arrives just in time.

Spider-Man, Spider-Man

Friendly neighborhood Spider-Man.

Wealth and fame He’s ignored

Action is his reward.

To him, life is a great big bang up

Wherever there’s a hang up

You’ll find the Spider-Man.

And remember, the cartoon is always IN COLOR.

Conversations at a Funeral

13 Jul

This week, we buried the father of my good friend. His death was expected, but that did not lessen the grief of the family and friends. The visitation and funeral were held in what I believe is our town’s best funeral home, housed in a stately manor that was the home of the Confederate Governor of Tennessee. He never took office because Union troops took Nashville rather quickly.

I have always found the actions of people at visitations and funerals interesting. I tend to sit back, observe and eavesdrop on conversations; and, in the process, I discover something interesting. There will almost always be an old lady who says, “It’s an awful good turnout.” It’s like she is talking about the crowd at  a ballgame or something.

Since I brought up sports, I should mention that it is the main topic of conversation among the men at a visitation. What’s going to happen this season? Are you going to watch the game tonight? There is also talk of work and travel. A constant line is “I haven’t seen you in forever.” On and on, the conversations go, but there is one topic that is hardly mentioned – DEATH.

The funeral service even stays away from death. The preachers talk about “the next life” and “everlasting life”. There is talk of this not being the end but rather the beginning. I realize this is done to comfort everyone. People at visitations avoid the topic of death because they are facing it at that very moment. Family and friends don’t want to hear about the ending of a loved one’s life, so people talk about the opposite.

Heck, I did it myself. My friend and I talked about funny stories from our past. The best one I had actually forgotten. In high school, we played a lot of backyard football and basketball at his house. Just picture a bunch of nerdy, non-athletic kids pretending like they could do something without falling all over themselves. His driveway was concrete, and that is where we were playing basketball.

One of us nerdy, non-athletic kids (not me) wanted to be like Mike and threw a behind-the-back pass. Unfortunately, the kid he was throwing it to had never heard of a behind-the-back pass and caught the ball with the bridge of his nose. The same bridge that supported his glasses. As you can imagine, glass, metal and blood went everywhere. As we stood in stunned silence, the bloody kid bent over and kept saying over and over, “I’m going to bleed on your driveway! I’m going to bleed on your driveway!”

There was another story from when were in college. My friend and I were picking up some girls to take to a party, and they answered the door wearing nothing but towels. However, I won’t bore you with the details.

On the Wings of Thorn Birds and the Winds of War

8 Jun

Have you ever noticed that television is filled with copycats? Let one show succeed, and the networks clamor with a plethora of similar shows. That’s why the airwaves are currently filled with reality shows and crime lab dramas. That’s why a few years ago we had dozens of game shows with contestants trying to become millionaires. That’s also why television from the mid-1970s to the mid-1980s was dominated by miniseries – dramas, usually based on popular novels, that spanned a few nights. They were must-see TV back in the day.

This topic has entered my mind because I am in the middle of rewatching one of my favorites. As I have watched it, I have remember how millions of people got caught up in these shows, and it seemed as if the world stopped to see what would happen. The following are the ones that I remember the most.

Centennial – The one I am currently watching was based on a James Michener novel and lasted over 26 hours. It traced the history of a western town from the arrival of the first trapper until the 1970s and took viewers into the lives of the people who played a role in the history of the area. It was fictional but had some real history mixed in. It seemed to star every television personality of the day, including Richard Chamberlain.

Roots – The granddaddy of them all, this miniseries was based on the work of Alex Haley, a fellow Tennessean, as he traced his family’s history through slavery. Over 100 million people watched it finale, and it spawned two sequels. After this success, Haley was sued for plagiarism and admitted that some parts of his work were lifted from another source. It seemed to star every African-American actor of the day but did not include Richard Chamberlain.

The Thorn Birds – Based on a novel by Colleen McCullough, it was the second highest rated miniseries of all time. Admittedly, I did not watch this one, and I am not sure my parents did either. It is set in Australia and follows a woman who is in love with a priest. This causes her problems for obvious reasons. It had a bevy of well-known stars, including Richard Chamberlain.

Rich Man, Poor Man – I always thought that was a cool title. This one came early in the miniseries experiment and lasted seven weeks. Based on a novel by Irwin Shaw, it followed the differing paths of the Jordache brothers. Obviously, one became wealthy, although not by selling fashionable jeans, and the other one struggled to get by. Peter Strauss and Nick Nolte played the brothers, but it did not star Richard Chamberlain.

Shogun – James Clavell’s novel was a fictionalized account of the life of William Adams. Don’t know who he is? Don’t worry, I don’t know either. However, I know that the main character is an Englishman named John Blackthorne, and he finds himself shipwrecked off the coast of Japan. After the wreck, he makes enemies and friends while trying to adjust to a different culture. The miniseries was filled with Japanese actors and Richard Chamberlain.

The Winds of War – Herman Wouk’s writing was the basis for this one as it details the years leading up to the entrance of the United States into World War II. It covers major world events during this period and their effects on two American families, the Henry’s and the Jastow’s. Robert Mitchum starred in this series, but it did not star Richard Chamberlain.

These are but a few examples of a genre that once thrived on the television sets of America. Obviously, I have missed several. If you have any favorites let me know.

Seeing Stars

25 May

Last night, I was having dinner at a local Mexican restaurant when I looked across the patio and saw someone who I recognized. It wasn’t an old friend or acquaintance. It was Gretchen Wilson, a singer who has gained a modicum of fame. I didn’t think much about it, and it seemed that the other diners didn’t think much about it either. However, it gave me an idea for a blog post.

One of the great aspects of Nashville is that you can see someone famous almost anywhere you go. A greater aspect is that those famous people do not get harassed by fans or paparazzi. They do their thing while non-famous Nashvillians do theirs. For example, if you want to see Vince Gill, then all you have to do is go to a Belmont University basketball game. Kenny Chesney shows up each time the University of Tennessee has a game in town. Once, I sat in front of Reba McEntire at a Nashville Predators game, and, last summer, I sat behind Wynonna Judd at a U2 concert. Although I haven’t seen her, I understand that Carrie Underwood and her fantastic legs spend a lot of time at Whole Foods.

Never fear, country stars are not the only people seen in these parts. Once, I played pool at a table next to Nicole Kidman and her husband, Keith Urban. Also, Reese Witherspoon is a native of Nashville. It seems that artists from all genres and endeavors are attracted to our fair city. Nashville isn’t Los Angeles or New York (thank goodness), but it has its fair share of famous people.

As I chewed my enchiladas, I began to think about this part of the Nashville experience and thought about a couple of encounters of my youth.

When I was a kid, my mom and I spent a lot of time at Opryland, a theme park that used to be here and still should be. One afternoon, we were leaving, and my mom needed to go to the restroom. Being the days when parents could leave children for a few minutes without worrying, my mom left me sitting on a bench and eating an ice cream cone. As I sat, an elderly man perched down beside me with an ice cream cone of his own. He asked a few questions but only got one word answers in reply. It was typical nice old man questions, but I was too shy to say too much.

My mom returned and spoke with him for a few minutes before we went on our way. Once we left hearing range, she asked if I knew who that was. I said that I didn’t, and she told me that it was Roy Acuff. Don’t know who that was? He was known as the “King of Country Music” and was the genre’s first superstar. I had been eating ice cream with a legend.

As a teenager I, like a lot of teenagers in the 80s, hung out at the mall. Unlike  a lot of teenagers in the 80s, I hung out at the bookstore in the mall. One day, I stood in front of a bookshelf, the history section I guess, with my head buried in a book. In the midst of reading, I felt someone walk up behind me and just stand there. It was like they were reading the same book over my shoulder. Honestly, it wasn’t comfortable. I kept reading and hoping they would move when the man behind me yelled for his son. I knew immediately who it was.

I turned my head to say hello, and he replied, “Hello, I’m Johnny Cash.” Well, he didn’t actually say that. He said something along the lines of how are you. The most interesting thing was that the “Man in Black” was wearing black sweatpants, a black sweatshirt and white tennis shoes.

So, if you are ever in Nashville keep an eye open. You might see a star. Just remember to act like a Nashvillian and not bother them. That’s one of reasons Nashville is great. Although, it’ll probably be alright to say hello or stare at Carrie’s legs.