Tennessee Beats Vanderbilt – No, Really They Did

21 Nov

My favorite t-shirt has “12.21.2012” written across the front. For many, that date represents an important day in Mayan prophecy and the end of times as we know them. Many people in my part of the world felt that the true end of the world had come on 11.19.2011, the date that Vanderbilt was favored over Tennessee in a game played in Knoxville. In case you didn’t realize, that had never happened before. For those of us who see the world through orange-tinted glasses, this was true Armageddon.

Fortunately for us, the earth balanced correctly on its axis and there was not an instantaneous ice age (as in that stupid Dennis Quaid movie). Tennessee prevailed in a classic SEC battle of heavyweights. Vanderbilt displayed finesse with four turnovers and two missed field goals. Their two touchdown drives covered a total of 41 yards. Tennessee came through with some nifty plays of its own. Tyler Bray threw a 99-yard touchdown to the wrong team, and the kicker missed a field goal when he hit the long snapper in the ass.

I have sat through a lot of games, and these had to be the two worst teams I have ever seen go against each other. Bad playing. Bad coaching. Stupid penalties. As icing on the cake, there was bad officiating. It’s good for the conference that no one outside of Tennessee cared about this game. If the world was watching, then the pundits would be up in arms about the whistle-no whistle-fumble recovery-interception-nonreviewable review at the end of the game.

Sadly, Tennessee fans were cheering wildly at the end as the team stormed the field. This was a win against VANDERBILT, and people acted like it was the national championship. How far has the program fallen? Vanderbilt had four turnovers and two missed field goals, and Tennessee was still lucky to win. And, people were thrilled. It’s funny what we will get used to. The program is truly wallowing in mediocrity…scratch that – Hell.

Derek Dooley is not the man to turn it around. I can only hope that AD Dave Hart looked around at the empty seats and the empty orange pants on the sidelines and came to the conclusion that this needs to be over sooner rather than later.

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