On our last day of vacation, I needed to do something different. We had been to the beach. We had been to Savannah, Georgia. We had done everything that there was to do. That is when I decided to go to the movies.
I had no idea what theater was the best and decided to hit the one with the most screens. After all, if a place has ten screens, then it must be good. I turned on the GPS and headed to the big ten screen theater. I pulled into the parking lot but could not find the movie house that the GPS was telling me was there. No neon sign. No marquee. Just a strip mall with a 1970s beach town architectural style.
With my hopes of a good movie experience dashed, I bought my ticket to Ant-Man and went to the concession stand for a box of Buncha Crunch. Then, I made my way to my screen. That is when I got the shock of my life.
The theater was filled with recliners. Yep, these were big cushioned seats that could lay your head back and put your feet up. I might not be able to see Ant-Man. I might not be able to hear Ant-Man. But, I was going to relax with Ant-Man.
The house was packed, and the movie began. Just as I was getting into it, I heard a strange sound. It was like everyone in the room had gas and decided to pass it. Then, I realized that it was the sound of pleather as people reclined their chairs. No problem. Once everyone is reclined, the noise would stop. However, it did not stop.
This is when I realized the downside of having recliners in a theater. It gives bored kids something to do. When the movie gets a little slow, they get on their reclining carnival ride and have a big time. It was easy to tell when the movie got exciting because the passing gas sounds stopped.
Ant-Man was a good movie, but it would be better in a theater with ragged old chairs that have broken springs sticking out.
SBI: A Thinning Crowd 
So, it was like being in the room with a giant fart? The kids must have had a blast (not meaning to be punny). That really is hilarious.
They were having a fine time.
Sounds … loud.
‘New and improved’ … therefore ruined.
At the Saturday Matinee in Drumheller, bored kids would often roll their pop bottles down the aisle. Yes, it was annoying.
But it was supposed to be.
At least the bottles required imagination. With the seats, they just pushed a button.