Tag Archives: The War Wagon

Movie Wisdom – Bruce Cabot Edition

15 Aug

A few weeks ago, I received an email from my brother that contained an interesting link – the Wikipedia page for Bruce Cabot. For those who do not know, Cabot was an actor who became a favorite costar of John Wayne. Being raised on John Wayne westerns, we know Cabot’s work well. However, this link had information that we did not know.

Cabot’s father was Major Etienne de Pelissier Bujac, Sr. Of course, that means Bruce Cabot was Etienne de Pelissier Bujac, Jr. before taking on a three syllable stage name. Wait, I got off track.

Cabot’s father was a prominent attorney in Carlsbad, New Mexico. You may be wondering where he received his law degree. That would be from Cumberland University in Lebanon, Tennessee – the place from where my brother and I have degrees and the place where I teach.

The western movie nerd that I am thinks that connection to Bruce Cabot and John Wayne is awesome. To celebrate, here are some words of wisdom from a few of Cabot’s movies.

From King Kong

The public must have a pretty face.

From Angel and the Badman

Funny thing about pancakes: I lose my appetite for ’em after the first couple a dozen.

The Lord moves in mysterious manner at times, using strange methods and odd instruments.

Each human being has an integrity that can be hurt only by the act of that same human being and not by the act of another human being.

The practice of medicine is one of the most infuriating professions known to man. It takes thirty years of experience to teach you that – in the final analysis – there’s nothing to do but stand and watch.

From The Comancheros

Words are what men live by.

Never go to bed without makin’ a profit.

Do not be too conceited.

From Hatari!

The first sign of spring in the bush and the young bucks start butting heads.

From McClintock!

All the gold in the United States Treasury and all the harp music in heaven can’t equal what happens between a man and a woman with all that growin’ together.

There’s no such thing as free land.

You have to be a man first before you’re a gentleman.

From In Harm’s Way

All battles are fought by scared men who’d rather be someplace else.

On the most exalted throne in the world, we are seated on nothing but our own arse.

Fish, or cut bait.

Indecision is a virus.

From The War Wagon

The world needs more simple understanding to bring people together.

From The Green Berets

That’s newspapers for you. You could fill volumes with what you don’t read in them.

From Chisum

No matter where people go, sooner or later there’s the law. And sooner or later they find God’s already been there.

From Big Jake

You shouldn’t butt into things that aren’t your business.

You know what the problem with money is? Somebody’s always trying to take it from you.

From Diamonds Are Forever

One is never too old to learn from a master.

 

Movie Wisdom – Kirk Douglas Edition

9 Dec

Today is the 101st birthday of Kirk Douglas, one of Hollywood’s great leading men. To celebrate this day, I decided to look for words of wisdom in his movies. He starred in many films, but, under the established rules, the quotes must come from movies that I have seen. If you have other favorites please let me know.

Without further adieu, here are some wise words from the movies of Kirk Douglas.

From 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea

I’ve yet to see the day you can make a deal with a mad dog.

From Man Without a Star

Twirlin’ a gun never saved a man’s life.

From Gunfight at the O.K. Corral

Poker’s played by desperate men who cherish money.

From The Vikings

Lies will not sustain a tyrant.

Love and hate are two horns on the same goat.

From Last Train from Gun Hill

Always take the long view.

From Spartacus

Taste is not the same as appetite.

From In Harm’s Way

All battles are fought by scared men who’d rather be someplace else.

On the most exalted throne in the world, we are seated on nothing but our own arse.

Fish, or cut bait.

Indecision is a virus.

From The War Wagon

The world needs more simple understanding to bring people together.

From The Man from Snowy River

There’s more to life than death.

 

The Many Names of John Wayne

24 Jan

The other day, I wrote about a John Wayne movie, and Andrew over at Have Bag, Will Travel had an interesting question. Of all the roles that John Wayne played, which character had the best name? With that in mind, I went in search for the answer.

John Wayne is credited with over 180 roles, and that means some limitations had to be placed on the experiment.3 Godfathers

First, I kicked out the movies that I have not seen. Honestly, I did not feel qualified to determine the strength of a character’s name if I did not know the strengths of the character.

Next, I threw out the times that the Duke played a real person. The purpose of this exercise was to find the best name created by some writer. Counting the given name of a real person is not that interesting or challenging.

On top of that, I decided not to count the times when he played someone named John. It is a total lack of creativity to have someone play a character and use their own name.

With the parameters set, the search commenced, and I was immediately met with disappointment. You would be surprised at how many times John Wayne played someone named Mike. Now, I am not trying to disparage all of the Mike’s in the world, but John Wayne does not strike me as a Mike. This list has to consist of names that fit the actor.

Oh yeah, there is one more thing. I stayed away from names that sound like the alter egos of superheroes. Joe January is interesting but also corny. Matt Masters is not much better. Unfortunately, I had to be consistent and not count Ethan Edwards.

The following names stuck out for several reasons. They fit the actor; they sound original and unique; and they are cool.

10. Tom Doniphon is a great name for a great character in a great movie, The Man Who Shot Liberty Valance. However, it loses points for not being the best name in the movie. How can you beat a name like Liberty Valance? For that matter, Ransom Stoddard is also a better name.

9. Taw Jackson wanted to get revenge by hijacking The War Wagon. The name is unique, but I cannot get around the fact that a taw is connected to the game of marbles. I never understood the fascination with marbles.

8. Rockwell Torrey got In Harm’s Way and turned the Pacific tide in World War II. He won the battle but lost a leg. The name is good, but there is a weakness. When I hear it, the Saturday Evening Post pops into my mind.

7. Cole Thornton is one of my favorite John Wayne character names. It also comes from a script that was turned into several movies. In my mind, El Dorado was the best of the bunch. It ranks seventh because it has less syllables than some of those ranked higher.

6. Chance Buckman fought oil fires, flew airplanes and was based on a real person. Hellfighters is one of my favorite non-western John Wayne movies. The name ranks sixth because I like Chance better than Cole.

5. Cord McNally was a Union officer who ended up at Old Tucson Studios. Rio Lobo is one of those movies that were all made from the same script. It is the worst of the bunch, but the character name has four syllables.

4. Jacob McCandles was also known as Big Jake. He was rich. He was tough. He had a town named after him. Also, everyone thought he was dead.

3. Nathan Cutting Brittles ranks this high because a character that has three names should rank higher than characters that have two names. Besides, She Wore a Yellow Ribbon is one of the John Ford cavalry pictures.

2. George Washington McLintock is a historical name and provides the title for the movie, McLintock. The town is also named for this character. Heck, the name dominates the entire movie.

1. Robert Marmaduke Hightower was one of the 3 Godfathers. Honestly, how can you beat a name like that? That is a five dollar name if I ever saw one.

Well, there is my list. I am sure there are other John Wayne fans who have their own ideas of what this list should look like. Let me know what you think.

 

 

Movie Wisdom – Sheb Wooley Edition

23 Jan

In the olden days, albums were sold on television. They would play snippets of a few songs and scroll song titles over the screen. The performer would appear and lip synch a few words. Those commercials fascinated me, and I begged my parents to send a check to the address on the screen.

One of those ads was for a singer named Ben Colder, the country music version of Weird Al Yankovic. He sung parodies of country music’s biggest hits. My parents agreed to buy a few albums, but they never bought anything for me by Ben Colder. It is still a disappointment.

Years later, I learned that Ben Colder was not really Ben Colder. He was Sheb Wooley, and he had done a lot more things than sing parody songs.Sheb Wooley

Sheb Wooley was a true Renaissance Man. He had a huge hit in the 1950s with “The Purple People Eater” and acted in a bunch of movies. However, he was not just in a bunch of movies. He was in a bunch of great movies. Sheb Wooley was one of those character actors who popped up everywhere.

To make up for the fact that I never got a Ben Colder record, we will examine the movies of Sheb Wooley to see if we can find a few bits of wisdom. As before, the quotes must come from movies that I have seen.

From High Noon

People gotta talk themselves into law and order before they do anything about it. Maybe because down deep they don’t care.

It takes more than big, broad shoulders to make a man.

It takes a pretty smart man to know when to back away.

From Johnny Guitar

A man who can’t hold on to a glass should drink like a baby from a bottle.

There’s only two things in this world that a ‘real man’ needs: a cup of coffee and a good smoke.

From Giant

Money isn’t everything.

Well, there’s one thing you got to say for cattle… boy, you put your brand on one of them, you’re gonna know where it’s at!

From Rio Bravo

Sorry don’t get it done.

From The War Wagon

That’s what I’ve always said the world needs… more simple understanding to bring people together!

From The Outlaw Josey Wales

Now remember, when things look bad and it looks like you’re not gonna make it, then you gotta get mean. I mean plumb, mad-dog mean. ‘Cause if you lose your head and you give up then you neither live nor win. That’s just the way it is.

It’s sad that governments are chiefed by the double tongues.

Buzzards gotta eat, same as worms.

Dyin’ ain’t much of a livin’, boy.

Don’t piss down my back and tell me it’s raining.

From Silverado

Some people think because they’re stronger, or meaner, that they can push you around. I’ve seen a lot of that. But it’s only true if you let it be. The world is what you make of it.

A grown man can’t have a little boy with him everywhere he goes.

The world is what you make of it, friend. If it doesn’t fit, you make alterations.

From Hoosiers

If you put your effort and concentration into playing to your potential, to be the best that you can be, I don’t care what the scoreboard says at the end of the game, in my book we’re gonna be winners.

Sun don’t shine on the same dog’s ass everyday.

There you have it. The world according to Sheb Wooley movies.