Tag Archives: White Lightning

Thoughts on a Funeral Procession

20 Dec

This afternoon, I was driving down the road when I saw blue lights up ahead. It was not a wreck. It was not a roadblock. It was a funeral procession. Like all of the other drivers, I came to a stop as a show of respect for the deceased and their family. While sitting still, a few thoughts crossed through my mind.

I wondered if stopping for a funeral procession is a southern tradition or if it happens in other parts of the country. Hopefully, some of you can answer that question. I just know that it is something people around here do automatically. In fact, I do not think highly of a person when I see them keep driving along.

I also thought about the job of law enforcement during a procession. Obviously, one leads the way. However, others block intersections and make sure no one pulls out in front of the oncoming cars.

Years ago, I was in a funeral procession, and we went through a four-way stop that did not have a police presence. A woman pulled out in front of us with her horn blowing. When she got in front of us, she flipped us off. Apparently, she had gotten mad at all of the people who were running the stop sign in front of her and decided to do something about it.

In recent years, there has become confusion about when the procession has completely passed. In the old days, drivers turned on their headlights as a sign of being part of the group. Now, the headlights of cars are on all the time. Which headlights are part of the procession and which ones are not? Having a squad car at the back might fix this problem.

After all of that, I thought about Sheriff Buford T. Justice. In Smokey and the Bandit, Jackie Gleason is chasing Burt Reynolds and gets caught up in a funeral procession. Like all good southerners, he stops out of respect. He does not know that the funeral director has slowed down the procession to help the Bandit.Buford

With hat in hand, Sheriff Justice proclaims, “If they’d a cremated the sum-bitch I could be kickin’ that Mr. Bandit’s ass around the moon by now.”

Burt Reynolds made another movie that ended with a funeral procession. In White Lightning, he played Gator McKlusky, a convict who goes undercover to expose a crooked sheriff. Of course, Burt wins and walks off as the hearse carrying the sheriff’s body goes by. Also, “Way Down Under” is playing over the entire affair.

Anyway, I go back to my original question. Do people in other parts of the country stop for funeral processions? If so, then what do you think about as you are sitting there?

The End

Movie Wisdom – Matt Clark Edition

7 Jun

Last night, we saw A Million Ways to Die in the West. It was not the worst movie I have ever seen, but it was not the best, either. Being a fan of Westerns, I knew what they were trying to do, but they could not quite accomplish it. However, there were a few things that I noticed.

They filmed in two of my favorite locations in the West, Monument Valley and the area around Santa Fe. Monument Valley was immediately recognizable, and, to the discerning eye, the other landscape was undoubtedly northern New Mexico.

I also noticed something else. One scene involves a grizzled old prospector, typical with his white beard and ragged clothes. As he spoke, I thought that I recognized the voice. It took a few seconds, but I finally realized that it was Matt Clark, who has appeared in a bunch of great movies.Matt Clark

He is another one of those character actors whose face people may know even when they do not know his name.

Seeing him in A Million Ways to Die in the West inspired me to compile wise quotes from some of his movies. Remember, a movie only qualifies if I have seen it and if it contains words to live by.

From Will Penny

That stuff’s for doctorin’! It’s not for drinkin’!

Sharin’ a blanket don’t make us married.

Ain’t no good way to go.

We don’t all have the same choices.

From The Cowboys

Well, it’s not how you’re buried, it’s how you’re remembered.

Every man wants his children to be better’n he was.

We’re burnin’ daylight.

Big mouth don’t make a big man.

Sometimes it’s hard to understand the drift of things.

The cow is nothing but trouble tied up in a leather bag.

From Jeremiah Johnson

Elk don’t know how many feet a horse has!

Keep your nose in the wind and your eye along the skyline.

Watch your top knot.

From Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid

It feels like… times have changed.

Comes an age in a man’s life when he don’t wanna spend time figuring what comes next.

From White Lightning

The good, they die young!

From The Outlaw Josey Wales

Now remember, when things look bad and it looks like you’re not gonna make it, then you gotta get mean. I mean plumb, mad-dog mean. ‘Cause if you lose your head and you give up then you neither live nor win. That’s just the way it is.

Dyin’ ain’t much of a living, boy.

It’s sad that governments are chiefed by the double tongues.

Buzzards gotta eat, same as worms.

Don’t piss down my back and tell me it’s raining.

I guess some folks don’t like to be called ‘high rollers’.

From Brubaker

You can’t reform the system if you’re not in it.

From The Quick and the Dead

Why is it that the man who begs for mercy never gives it?

From Back to the Future Part III

Your future is whatever you make it.

We all have to make decisions that affect the course of our lives.

From Barbarians at the Gate

Let them curse the darkness – we’re not handing out any candles.

From 42

Roses and sleep are two wonderful things. But sleep you can get when you’re in your casket, and flowers look great on top of it.

From A Million Ways to Die in the West

Hey, dude, you really shouldn’t drink and horse.

 

Movie Wisdom – Burt Reynolds Edition

30 May

A couple of blogging ideas popped into my mind over the weekend, and I decided to smash them together to form a semi-regular series of posts.

First, I went on a quick trip to Chattanooga, which isn’t too far away, and crossed Monteagle Mountain along the way. Those not from Tennessee may not know about Monteagle, but it is one of the great spots in our state. It is also where the Bandit gained his notoriety. Don’t know what Bandit I am talking about? Well, there is only one Bandit, and that is the one played by Burt Reynolds in Smokey and the Bandit. According to the opening song, the Bandit became famous when he safely steered his jack-knifed truck down Monteagle.

As I crossed the mountain, I started thinking about a blog of my favorite Burt Reynolds movies.

Then, I published a post that included a profound line from one of my favorite movies. I have done this before and have noticed that it has become a habit in my blogging/tweeting life. With that in mind, I started thinking about a post of movie quotes that could also be used as guidance in our daily lives. It seems that screenwriters can be quite clever when given time to come up with something.

With those two ideas running through my mind, I came to the smash idea where I will take movie stars and list the “life guidance” quotes from their films. The quotes may be profound, funny, or just plain dumb. The common denominator is that I think they are great lines and can be useful in some way.

Before the listing begins, there are a few rules.

1. I must have seen the movie.

2. Each movie must include the mentioned movie star (although they may not be the one that says the line).

So, here goes with movie wisdom from Burt Reynolds movies.

From Deliverance

“Sometimes you have to lose yourself ‘fore you can find anything.”

“If you hit any rocks don’t hit ’em with your head.”

From White Lightning

“I was born ready.”

“The good, they die young.”

“Only two things in the world I’m scared of – women and the police.”

From The Longest Yard (The original. Not the Adam Sandler crap.)

“Shaving points off a football game. Man, that’s un-American.”

“I’ve always had my shit together. Always. My problem’s been I couldn’t lift it.”

From Smokey and the Bandit

“If you’re gonna hang out in places like this wear a badge on your didey.”

“Cowboys love fat calves.”

“I guess a legend and an out of work bum look a lot alike.”

“I take my hat off for one thing. One thing only.”

“When you tell somebody somethin’, it depends on what part of the United States you’re standin’ in as to just how dumb you are.”

From Smokey and the Bandit II

“When you raid a cathouse, you take the piano player, too.”

From The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas

“I started out poor, and I worked my way up to outcast.”

From Striptease

“I don’t need no stripper to tell me how to live.”

From Boogie Nights

“What do you expect when you’re on top? You know? It’s like Napoleon. When he was king, you know, people were just constantly trying to conquer him, you know, in the Roman Empire. So, it’s history repeating itself all over again.”